Monday, February 19, 2007

The Precious Cacophony

With thanks to Karmyn

Eldest Daughter and Only Son child number two are fighting. Again.

They always fight.

They always tell me that I am being unfair, because I never tell the other one off enough in their opinion. It seems that there should be a written scale of told offness to adhere to when the chips are down.

This is a bit of motherhood that I am clearly lacking in and need some lessons on. Or so my eldest two would tell me at least.

As a mother, it's hard sometimes to get it right. You want to be fair, but as they get older, you are not necesarily present when the fight starts. So you try to listen to both sides of the argument, and before long you realise that you are simply in the midst of a cacophony orchestrated by both sides.

It's a loud cacophony.

Daughter number two, child number three, is torn. She likes both of the older two. Can see the side of both, and can see that both are giving me rather a hard time.

Meanwhile, daughter number three, child number four, aged 8, is throwing a hissy fit about the fact that she has to go to gym in the middle of half term. Words like not fair, tired, holiday, all come to the fore. And daughter number four, child number five is being dressed up by eldest daughter. The end result is stunning, hair and all. She is still blissfully unaffected by older siblings' battles. Either that or she is so used to it that she passes it off as just part of daily life. I suspect strongly that it is the latter.

Later, we get home having dropped off eldest son off with a friend and daughter number three, child number four, (quite happily) off at gym to do amazingly athletic gymnasticy things that I have never been capable of. Eldest daughter is picked up by a friend to go shopping. She too looks happy.

It being the middle of the day, Hubby is out at work
Just three of us left.

It's so quiet.

It's too quiet.

Bring back the cacophony.


Asha said...

Isn't that funny?! We wish they were somewhere else when they are around and then miss them terribly when they are not around!!!Life!!!!:D

Ignorminious said...

My mum always claimed to miss us when ever we were away, even though we were always fighting. I guess you get used to the noise and arguements, even if you don't like them.

Sally Lomax said...

Hi Asha and Ignorminious

I agree. It's just like that. i hate it when they are not around, and worry about them.........

You ahte it when they are fighting, but when all is so quiet, you think that something must be wrong!

Wendz said...

Funny that - my boys came home tonight for their week with me...and as we sat and ate supper I said I was so happy to have them home again and I'd missed them terribly- but that I really enjoyed the silence when they are not at home. They were disgusted with me!

Yet true as Bob - their fighting (after just 3 hours at home) and the noise of their playing is driving me round the bend. Not to mention the refereeing thingymabob. Sheesh!

How do you manage with so many kids? I come from a family of 5 kids too - but cannot remember how much noise we made...a lot I guess.

Sally Lomax said...

I think it's all relative Wendz. you sort of get used to the noise level you live with.

I tell myself that they will be easier adults because they came from a family of five kids........

john.g. said...

Sally, you have a good memory, child 3, daughter 4...etc.

ChrisB said...

sally I am currently being reminded what it's like to be in the centre of a 'battle field'with lots of squabbles but I will miss it when I go home.

Swampwitch said...

Oh, those days of squabbles. How I do miss them. The quietness without them is a cacophony in my ears.
Reality sets in, together for an evening...decision about where to eat...squabbling grows to a loud roar.
Did I say I missed that. Someone pinch me.
Wishing you a wonderful week as I may not have much time for visiting.
Posting using my BloggerBooger account as it won't let me post as "other" today.

Pamela said...

okay.. quit using such big words.
I had to look it up in my Funk & Wagnall just to make sure I knew that I knew what it meant.

I've seen it spelled with Cacophony. So I looked them both up. The one with the O was more a myriad of colors.

In either case, when the kids are gone and then visit with their own broods you really see a contrast from your quiet and dull house to the colorful world and noisy world of kids.

Beccy said...

Today has been a noisy day here as we all spent it together. Mollie hates Dillon and Ben, Ben adores Dillon and Mollie is ok, Dillon adores Ben and hates Mollie. According to Mollie she got told off more and was ready to leave home. Dillon's loud voice can be heard booming...

Tomorrow will be calm, Dillon off with friends, Mollie playing in a tennis tournament so it's Mum, Ben, mother-in-law and myself going out for lunch...bliss.

Karmyn said...

I went to two child birthday parties this weekend. Talk about noise-filled craziness. Yet - as I stood there and looked at all the kids running around, I realized how much love was in those rooms. No matter what, there is a parent who adores them.

Emma in Canada said...

My two oldest fight constantly. I get mad at which ever one I can hear, usually my daughter who gets mad at ehatever irritating thing he very quietly does. Unfair for her I know!

Right now she is at the waterpark, he and the 2 year old are out sledding and the baby is sleeping, It isvery peaceful, something my house doesn't see often.

Sally Lomax said...

Thanks John - although I do wonder sometimes. Whilst I can still remember the order of birth of my five children - most of the time - i am having great difficulty in learning a part for a play I am in currently. This is something that I have never had difficulty with before, so am panicking somewhat!!!! Can Alzheimers set in a 44 and 3/4???

Sally Lomax said...

Well -Was busy this eveing and came back to LOTS of comments!! Thank you everyone!

Chris - I agree!

Swampwitch - Glad that nothing changes then as they get older!!

Pamela - It was a spelling error!! Sorry!! Now corrected!! I definitely meant that it was lots of noise. "The Precious Noise" didn't work so well as a title though!!!!!!

Beccy - Exactly!

Karmyn - Isn't there just?! I agree.

Enjoy your five minutes Emma!!!!!

min said...

Guitar, phone chatter, bicker, bicker, bicker, drumming on table tops, smacking gum,x-plosion Box, T.V. too loud--I have teens. Noisy wonderful teens.

john.g. said...

What`s Alzheimers? Aged 45.

Sally Lomax said...

Min - Ezactly!

John - I've forgotten!

Anonymous said...

Just been for a beer with John G, and he says I should look you up. So here I am, all bright-eyed and bushytailed with whiskers a-twitching. How do?


Sally Lomax said...

Welcome Keith!!
Hope you enjoy the blog!!

Will have a look at your blog too!


Ailsa said...

My Mum often said "Stop arguing" when we weren't. Very annoying. Now I find myself doing the same thing with my two. Young people obviously discuss things much louder than we do.

Sally Lomax said...

Hi Ailsa

That is true. However, it's also true that they do argue!!!


The very nice man said...

Having 4 kids ourselves I know what chaos can erupt at any time but like you said . . when they are gone it is just eerily quiet! We have taken to have "time out" just for Jan and me by eloping to the local restaurant ever now and then!

PI said...

Hi Sally! Here via John.g. Your post takes me back but in the early years only had two boys to cope with but it felt likd six.!

PI said...

The earliest Altzheimers I knew was 54 - my darling brother.
John it is when your brain just seizes up and you gradually forget everything including the simplest function - commonly known as the long goodbye.

Sally Lomax said...

VNM - Now that is a good idea! Good for you.

Pi! Hi! and Welcome!! If your 2 felt like six sometimes, then I guess that my 5 must feel like 15!!!!!

But actually it doesn't really. I am a typical 40 something tired all the time woman, but apart from that I ahve always said that the incremental gain of each additional child is not equivalent to a single child several times over. It does get easier and they do entertain each other. (When not squabbling that is!)

That is very sad about your brother. I wasn't completely serious, but - 54 - it does make you think.....

Momo said...

Sometimes it is soo quiet in our flat and than I wish a family of three...or maybe four...let's be honest five!

Sally Lomax said...

Hi Momo!

Look forward to hearing the news then!!

Sally :)

elena jane said...

lol, that is just the way, when they're here it's all banging and yelling and MOM and when they're gone for too long the silence is deafening.
and the little one, who is oblivious, it's gotta be the 5th child thing.
my oldest thinks i blame him for all things, i try not to discipline them in company of their sibs. you never yell at so and so, ahem, yes i do!
ahh, the joy of 5 :)

Sally Lomax said...

Elena Jane

Definitely a fifth child thing!!