Tuesday, October 09, 2007

It's over to Enidd's...

To read me today, you will have to go to Enidd's blog!

And for all those who didn't make it as far as Enidd's, it is now put on here as well, unchanged and with the introduction, as put on Enidd's site.

Win Win!

Sally is delighted to be a glogger* on Enidd's site, and honoured that Enidd chose the person with whom (Enidd and she have discovered over a number of posts on both blogger's sites) she shares a mutual hatred of banks, to be one of her representatives during her long earned holiday. Sally's problems with banks are possibly different to Enidd's, as Enidd's hassles stem from them not allowing to use her own money, whereas Sally's hassles are due to them not allowing her to use their money. Sally sees that this purely as a matter of pedanticism on the banks' part and that either way, banks stink. Enidd of course tells the tales of Stalin, Fluffy and The Man. Sally's cast list includes a cast of thousands of children, a man by the name of Hubby and a dog who is mad. Sally's lifelong ambition is to be on Enidd's list of "humourous blums" on her Eggroll. She hopes that one day she will aspire to such heights. Enidd does of course write in the third person, and Sally normally writes in the first. But in honour of Enidd, as she is a guest on Enidd's blog, and when in Rome one should after all do as the Roman's do, Sally is today writing in the third person. Sally has tried in her spare time to give up the habit of capital letters, but after several attempts has failed miserably, and has now decided that in essence, you can take a blogger away from their capital, but you can't always take the capitals out of some of those slightly more stubborn and a little more awkward *gloggers.
*glogger: Guest Blogger.

It is just another ordinary morning: A call at a ridiculously early hour from a call centre; a letter from the bank, demanding money, that they had in fact already had; a wet shirt in the washing machine needed by ED (Eldest Daughter), now, today, not tumble dryable (of course), and so with the only option available to iron dry; and another letter from a different bank with yet another charge, unfairly administered in Sally's humble opinion. The boiler, still broken, isn't warm. In fact the whole house is very cold. This, coupled with ironing dry a very wet blouse, dealing with a call centre first thing, dealing with post, that is post from the letter box, not the writing sort, puts Sally in a seriously bad mood. Had it been the "writing" sort of post it would probably have put Sally in a good mood, as writing often has that effect on her. But sadly it is the mail variety. And not that male variety either.

Once the children are all at school, she starts with the banks. "I paid you on the right date, many many mars bars worth of cash." Sally explains to bank number one (that is the bank who very kindly, a few years back, bought Sally and Hubby's house for them and said that they could live in it, as long as Sally and Hubby paid this thing called interest. Sally shows a lot of interest in the interest, but it seems that the bank definitely has the upper hand on such interesting matters). Bank number one has a look at their computer screen. Something that Sally thinks banks seems to like. They come back to Sally after a few moments. "Yes Mrs. Lomax. In fact, you are right. You did pay us. We have now put a note on your account and reversed the £40 charge. Sally had not even been aware of this particular charge, so although grateful and relieved, is also slightly annoyed that it had been there in the first place. Still, onwards and upwards, £40 in the right direction, the day is getting slightly better.

Next call. Next bank. Big grumble. Big moan. Had been working. Had been busy. Had forgotten to check accounts. Had forgotten to transfer some money at the relevant time. All sorted now........ blah blah blah....... "ALL RIGHT Mrs. Lomax........ On this occasion, as a gesture of goodwill, as we banks are fundamentally good natured Quaker types, who are seriously, really, honestly into making people's lives so much easier, we will refund the £39 to your account." "Thank you so much.......grovel......grovel some more.....grovel some more." "However, Mrs. Lomax......." There then follows long lecture about how Sally should run her account from her on in..... Grovel some more. Put phone down. Day getting slightly better. Now £79 up. Sally's next call is to the people who are hopefully to be supplying her new boiler. Ironically Sally discovered that due to the enormous quote from British Gas earlier this year, that it it is almost as cheap to get a range style cooker which will do the heating as well, instead of an ordinary boiler, which due to the many radiators that need heating, needs in fact to be two boilers and, due to the regulations having changed, need to be moved to the cellar. The range has the added advantage of being allowed to go where the existing boiler is in the kitchen, in the fireplace, will look very nice indeed, and will not leave a very big hole in the kitchen to be subsequently dealt with, and also paid for. As such, although Sally is not a golfer, to coin a golfer's phrase, it is a "win win" situation.

Always fighting the pennies however, and these are actually the pennies of a very kind MIL (Mother in Law) this time, as she has kindly offered to pay for said device, Sally asks the inevitable question: "Can you better that quote please? We are trying very hard to get it within x number of mars bars.." "I'll ask the boss", says person on the phone, "but I wouldn't hold your breath." Sally holds it for a second, and then agrees with the man on the phone. She does however have another idea. "Some dealers were offering £220 worth of cooking equipment to go with the range. I saw it on the internet. Are you?" "That offer ran out on 1st October." Says helpful man on end of phone. "But that was only a week ago", says Sally, and it has taken you eight weeks to complete the quote. "Yes well, the offer comes from the supplier. There isn't much we can do about that. Sally ends call, and then calls the supplier........ Bit of checking at their end. Get another phonecall from the range dealer. They will honour the promotional pack.

As she adds up her day's gains, it seems to Sally that sometimes, hassle, whilst irritating, is after all an essential part of life. The total gain for today's hassles is £299. Better than working thinks Sally.

20 comments:

pierre l said...

Does this post mean that Sally will have a boiler in the near future? Pierre does not like the idea that Sally and family might become very ill through lack of heating.
(writing in the third person is difficult - well done Sally, Enidd and Yaxlich)

pierre l said...

pierre forgot that the comment above should be written without the use of capital letters. pierre apologises. pierre finds it easier to write without capital letters than to write in the third person.

Anonymous said...

Don't know if you'll get comments on enidd's blog, so here I am.
Good for you getting some money back (though having to spend so much to get that amount, well,at least it's something!) I guess it was worth the time and effort. So mant times I think these big companies just figure most people won't bother, so too bad, we'll charge you anyway!

sallywrites said...

Pierre - Sally seriously hopes so! She also quite likes writing in the third person she has found, but still cannot give up the capitals.

Lisa - Sally thinks you are absolutely right. These companies wait for people to ask!

Alix said...

Great post in the style of Enidd, I'm glad you got your money and your cooking equipment. Hope the range is installed soon and without any problems

Unknown said...

Sally should not give up the capitals, for that would be showing a disrespect to the English language. And it's also crap grammar!

Anonymous said...

You have post (Mail) ??

sallywrites said...

Alix:
Thank you!
John: Indeed!
Janie:
Yes. Strangely Sally has had post.... She didn't get post on one day, but that's all. She has had it every day otherwise!

headless chicken said...

hc thinks this is all getting very confusing but agrees sally's post as guest blogger on ennids blog was brilliant!hc is also glad there will be no need for thermals in sally's house this winter.

Anonymous said...

i'm lol @ the lower case letters. i have written this way for YEARS.....
i am fed up with banks for you....we have one bank. they seem fairly tolerable....but then again i never need to call them except to order checks :)

sallywrites said...

Thanks HC! Sally is by the way very sorry about all the added cost of thermals during last winter. She hopes that HC will enjoy many more cups of coffee in a house that will be without the need for thermals!

Thanks EJ - I'd like to use the bank just to order cheques! Maybe I have too many conversations with them. Perhaps that's where we go wrong? Thanks for the nice comment though...

Akelamalu said...

As Sally already knows the use of CAPITALS is very important in stressing points, so Sally should carry on regardless.

sallywrites said...

Indeed Ak. I will!

Pamela said...

I learned much from this post.
you are a wheeler dealer and I didn't know "win-win situation" was a golf term.

meredic said...

zzzzzzz Nnngh wha,...hey i seem to have missed this earlier.
£299 for a few calls. Sounds good to me.
Whats all this I see as well. pierre l calling you a boiler...lord help us Sal zzzzzz
*nods off again*

ChrisB said...

I think I commented on enidd's blog, I'm a bit haywire this week.

Beccy said...

Saw this at enidds Sally, great post.

sallywrites said...

Thanks Pam. BTW Hubby thinks that I got the win win thing wrong. He thinks it isn't a golfing term!

Meredic - A pot boiler maybe? Maybe that's whht I should be doing. Writing one!

Thank you Chris!

Thanks Beccy!

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